SOUL EXPRESSION

Awaken your soul and fire up your senses. Turn up the volume on your inner wisdom. Increase your capacity for truth, love, openness, passion, fire and freedom.

I Want You To Stop

Sometimes I read back through my journal to see how far I’ve come…or not.  Am I still worried about the same stuff I was worried about 2 months ago?  Has the list of things I’m grateful for grown? What kind of progress have I made personally and professionally?

I was flipping through yesterday and came across this entry, it’s about a month old.  I’m using it as the basis for today’s post, because since I wrote this, I’ve stopped doing a lot of sh*t that was holding me back big time- so I know it can work for you too.

One of the hardest things in life is wanting to help people who either don’t want it or aren’t ready for it.  No one is better than anyone else-but some people gather wisdom worth sharing and it hurts to watch others choose suffering over learning.  Pride gets in the way-emotions cloud perspective.  It’s not easy being a human.  So much thinking and feeling going on.  All we can do is our very best, put good intentions behind our actions, and trust in the timing of God & the Universe.  Learn from the past but leave it there.  Stop belaboring the things that didn’t go the way we wanted.  Would you rather be right or happy?  Happy always wins…well it should.  Timing is good to you when you’re happy to be wherever you are.

So what do I want you to stop doing?

Resisting.  Denying.  Hiding.  Remaining. Lying. Reliving.

Maybe you’re not guilty of everything on that list right now, but at some point, we all dabble in each one.

We resist, deny and hide feelings all of the time.  Sometimes, it’s so bad, we don’t even know how we feel.  Ever burst into tears, someone asks, “What’s wrong?” and the answer is…”I dooonn’t knoowww”?

We also resist and deny our reality.  Blocking things out is just easier when actually having to deal with it is a bear, but it always comes back to bite you in the a*s.

We remain in situations we know are wrong.  We lie to ourselves about all kinds of things.  “Mini cupcakes don’t count right?” Sorry homey, they’re made from the same sugar, butter and flour as the big ones. Or “When he said this, he really meant this, right?” Wrong.

We also relive the past and wonder why we’re not moving forward.

How to Stop Resisting.  Denying.  Hiding.  Remaining. Lying. Reliving…

These two things jumped out at me the most when I re-read the entry above:

All we can do is our very best and put good intentions behind our actions. I just finished reading Bethenny Frankel’s book A Place of Yes.  One of her chapters is called Everything’s Your Business.  True statement, but easily forgotten in daily life.  She sums it up at the end with this, “Do everything to the best of your ability, give every job your all, and treat everything like it’s your business.  Respect others, play fair, do what feels right…”

This is about integrity.  Who are you when nobody is watching?  Take pride in everything you do.  Other people will notice, and you will feel fan-freaking-tastic about yourself.  I promise.

Not everything you do will be welcomed by all and praised by the masses.  If your true intentions are good, do it anyway.  If you aren’t clear on your intentions, wait until you are, then decide.  This applies to everything. Are you out to impress someone else? or feed your own soul? To help people or to look good?  Keep it real people-the world needs more real and true.

Timing is good to you when you’re happy to be wherever you are. What the hell?  Bad timing is such a great excuse anytime something isn’t working out.  This is a matter of perspective.  Try it out.  Next time you want to chalk something up to bad timing, step back and figure out why it’s right timing.  What’s the real lesson there? The real opportunity?

A friend of mine was telling me a story about her client who was stuck in a relationship she knew was wrong but she was paralyzed by the fear that she wouldn’t meet anyone better.  So what happens? A great guy asked her out-and although she wasn’t ready to date, she saw the message clearly, “There are other great guys out there, stop being afraid.”  She could have said, “Ugh! Of course I meet this great new guy when I’m not ready for all of that.” But she was smarter than that.  Bravo.

This applies to so many things.  Ever have a great opportunity come your way and have to turn it down because you were too busy? That wasn’t the opportunity for you.

Last summer I sprained my ankle the during the first night of a bootcamp class I was really excited to teach-that put me out for the count for several weeks.  It wasn’t bad timing, it was my call to get educated about nutrition.  If I couldn’t exercise I had to eat way better.  And now, I can teach it to you.  Perfect.

Accepting that you’re always exactly where you’re supposed to be liberates you from feeling sorry for yourself, and puts you in control.  Now, you can connect with your gut, take stock of what’s going down-and take action to move forward.

So what are you going to stop doing?  What actions can you take?  Where have you been stuck?  Leave a comment below, I’m rooting for you!

I Want You To Stop
  • http://www.victoriagibson.com.au Victoria Gibson

    I’m going to stop opening the fridge door every time I have to do something I really don’t want to!

    • http://talkingshrimp.com/blog lbelgray

      I do that too, Victoria. But I’d have to include the cabinet in my resolution. I have a shelf I’ve dubbed the “snack center.” It’s my go-to when I’m stuck on an assignment.

      • http://fithealthyandbeautiful.com Liz DiAlto

        A little procrastination disguised as snacking? PDS! I do this too, started subbing tea for the snack in January-made a big difference for me.

  • Cara Mitchell

    “Accepting that you’re always exactly where you’re supposed to be liberates you from feeling sorry for yourself, and puts you in control. Now, you can connect with your gut, take stock of what’s going down-and take action to move forward.”

    Exactly what I needed to come across right now, looove. 🙂

    • http://fithealthyandbeautiful.com Liz DiAlto

      You can do it 🙂

  • http://www.kdhfinancial.com Karie

    I am going to stop mind-f*cking myself. When people show you who they are, believe them! I think that’s a quote or similar to a quote by someone. I am sooo good at “seeing the best in people” but really it’s a bunch of bs. I choose to block out very obvious red flags and pretend that everyone is just wonderful. Not anymore!

    • http://fithealthyandbeautiful.com Liz DiAlto

      This is tough Karie. I think there’s a fine line between seeing the potential in people, and making excuses for them. I’ve definitely struggled with that too. The bottom line is exactly what you said, they might have potential but red flags are happening now. Get ’em girl!

  • http://www.heatherpierceinc.com/blog Heather Pierce

    I’m going to stop resisting and remember the worst case scenario really isn’t even that bad! And I’m going to stop leaving my damn email open all day. Thanks for sharing such a personal story Liz!

  • Jeannette

    Lovely post Liz and perfect timing…hehe 🙂

    I recently went through some old journals of mine and find myself stuck in a very similar situation right now that I was in about 6 years ago. For the days following all I did was ask myself why am I doing this to myself again and telling myself I’m so dumb that I don’t know better by now. Ugh! So not cool yo. Anyway I was in a cab the other night when I had the revelation that I just need to stop figuring out why, give myself a dose of self love and be open to the lesson that I obviously did not learn the first time around. Having this fresh perspective has allowed me to finally take action on somethings I have been procrastinating on and come to face to face with some hard truths. Yeah I’ve cried a whole lot however after the crying and wiping the boogies from my nose I feel a sense of serenity within me that tells me Iit’s all good, the Universe has my back 🙂 It’s true what you said in your post, I do feel liberated and in more control. Thanks for posting this!

    • http://fithealthyandbeautiful.com Liz DiAlto

      GO JEANNETTE, GO!!! We have your back too, by the way 🙂

  • Jacqui

    “Not everything you do will be welcomed by all and praised by the masses. If your true intentions are good, do it anyway. If you aren’t clear on your intentions, wait until you are, then decide. This applies to everything. Are you out to impress someone else? or feed your own soul? To help people or to look good? Keep it real people-the world needs more real and true.”

    Women empowering other women (and men hopefully 😉 …you know it is amazing how many women still feel trapped by others’ aesthetic/superficial expectations of them. I know many that have been missing out on the opportunity to find real growth and development–intellectual, artistic, physical, etc. Time for women to be true protagonists (or at least I want to see those numbers climbing) Keep spreading your magic Liz!

    • http://fithealthyandbeautiful.com Liz DiAlto

      Jacqui, thank you for this comment, and for contributing to the magic. Yes!!!

  • Marissa

    you are sooooo flippin fantastic

    • Liz DiAlto

      thanks Marissa, can’t wait to see you in a month!! x