wild soul stories

Wild Soul Movement stories and experiences told by the women.

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Wild Woman

Sarah L'Hrar |Completed Wild Soul Movement Summer Session

Occupation: Fashion Designer

Lives: Montreal

Click to listen to Sarah’s interview.

If you’re inspired by Sarah’s story and want to create your own, join us for Fall Session of Wild Soul Movement. Enrollment is open through Friday Sept 26 at midnight PST. Details here.

INTERVIEW TRANSCRIPT:

Liz:
Hello! This is Liz DiAlto, creator of Wild Soul Movement, and this is a Wild Soul Story Interview with Ms. Sarah L’Hrar. Did I say that right, Sarah?

Sarah:
No, nobody can say it right! (laughter). It’s “El-Harar.” Like “rawr,” el ha-rawr!

Liz:
I’ve been actually wondering for months now everytime I see your name in the Facebook group, how to say that, so thank you for correcting me.

The purpose of Wild Soul Movement for anybody listening who doesn’t know is to help women develop self-love, self-trust, and self-acceptance. We do this through a movement practice that combines mantras, meditations and sensual movement. Things like body weight exercises, yoga, stretching, circling, and some other stuff that I like to throw in here and there. But it’s really about building an intimate relationship with yourself, and discovering how everything you’ve ever needed really has always been inside of you – whether or not you’ve ever experienced that in your life before. The point is not to work-out, but to work-in.

The purpose of these Wild Soul Story interviews is to show you how every woman’s journey is unique, as are their results. And because this isn’t a workout or a fitness program, you’re not going to see a bunch of before and after pictures at WildSoulMovement.com, because I cannot take pictures of people’s insides, and that’s really what shifts.

Sarah is a 37 year old fashion designer. She lives in Montreal, and before I start asking her any questions, I just need to shower her with a little bit of love, because over the course of her summer session in WSM she was just an absolute shining light in the Facebook group. Always present, and when I say always present – not always, because she’s been working a lot for the last couple weeks – but her presence is felt through the comments and support and really the sisterhood that she leant to a lot of other women. Even some private messages she was sending throughout, to give me feedback and to thank me, she’s just been such a joy to have in there. So before we start anything Sarah, I just want to thank you so much for being such an amazing member of the community!

Sarah:
You know, I can’t thank you enough for offering this community to me, and I know I can speak for the rest of us as well – the sisterhood is for sure something to be reckoned with. It’s really a huge part of the program. I think everybody goes in wanting to work on oneself and what’s going on inside of you, but then there’s like these amazing women around you doing the same work simultaneously.

It just creates this really deep bond which is so strange on the internet, because you don’t know these women. Then Facebook is like the virtual profile and pictures, so you kind of get a grasp of who they are, but we got so intimate. We got into some really deep, intimate, personal stuff together – and I think the friendships that I built there, it’s like summer camp! (laughter)

Liz:
Yup! (laughter)

Sarah:
You met these people that are like your best friends in the world. It’s really magic.

Liz:
Thank You.

Sarah:
And to say thank you to me that I was just, like I couldn’t believe what was going on in this group. It was just so stimulating, that I just wanted to show up and it was the best, the best – so thank YOU actually!

Liz:
So we can continue having a love fest here (laughter), we really could do that all day long! But I do want to ask you some questions. Everyone’s experience is different – there are definitely some highs, definitely some lows, but going all the way back to the beginning, why did you join Wild Soul Movement?

Sarah:
You know I was really not expecting to find your website and I listened to your interview on Foxy’s website, and some things you said in there just struck so loud with me. But I didn’t follow up with looking at your website until I saw you on the Desire Map page. And when I looked at the site and when I read the things you said, I got shivers all over. You know when you read something that’s just Truth and it rings so loud, it resonates inside your body – like you feel it sink in.

Before I joined the group, the things I read that you said, already had changed me. Five minutes on the blog and I was already like in awe of the work that you were giving. You know when you find a little gem and it’s something so special and you just want to dig and dig and dig – so I HAD to be a part of it.

So I connected with you, and then etcetera, the contest … and I won! (giggles)

Liz:
That’s right! The schoIarship, I forgot about that! You were so brave!

Sarah:
I won! (laughing)

Liz:
I’m so glad you did that! I remember you asking, ah, so brave!

So here’s another question for you. You mentioned that you found me on Foxy’s website, which for anyone listening – that is a great friend of mine and her website is www.forbiddenlife.com Her blogs are amazing and she also does these interviews called Forbidden Conversation, and that’s what Sarah is talking about that I did with Foxy, and that’s actually one of my favorite interviews I’ve ever done.

What other kind of personal development had you done before WSM?

Sarah:
You know, I think my story is a little bit different because my parents were very much into personal development and spirituality growing up. I kind of had an overdose of the new age hippie stuff by the time I was 20. (laughter).

My parents were eating kale and Kashi before people knew what it was. I was that odd kid at school with blue chips and stuff like that. I was totally over it, I wanted to be just “normal.” I would joke around that I wanted my dad to be an accountant, because he was the leader of a community of meditation. By the time I was 20 I was over it!

Deepak and Eckhart Tolle and all these people, big names in spirituality, were always names around my house that were common. By the time I was 30 I kind of hit some personal stuff and I knew that the only way I could look was within. I went back into reading Marianne Williamson and slowly one thing leads you to another. At first I was literature congested by mom, you know, Don Miguel Ruiz, the Four Agreements…

Liz:
Mmm, one of my favorites!

Sarah:
So much for me! But then one thing happened and I fell upon Danielle LaPorte’s work. Which, for me, was completely refreshing, because it was more my type of talk. I felt like I could do it, that it was acceptable. That it wasn’t this golden mountain of unreachable meditation, transcendental, outside of yourself, that I couldn’t reach. What Danielle LaPorte was offering was right there for me to grasp and do it. I really loved that. And that really blew my mind. Shivers, tears, laughter – the whole thing.

Doing the Desire Map for me was a huge part of my growth in the recent years. It really made a huge difference when I needed it. It actually lead me back to all the first things I knew all my life, but now rediscovering it with my own eyes, without my parent’s influence.

Liz:
Yeah, and you know from conversations that we’ve had in the private Facebook group for Wild Soul Movement, there would be no Wild Soul Movement without Desire Map. I am also a huge proponent of Danielle LaPorte’s work, I love that.

The next thing I want to ask, I just want you to kind of freeflow here, tell us about your experience in Wild Soul Movement. For anyone who doesn’t know, it’s 12 weeks, there’s 12 videos and I send out a new video every week. There is a journal to support each weeks video, and we have mantras. So often I ask questions in the Facebook groups, but also in the journals to prompt deeper self discovery and exploration of the topics that we work through. And then we have a Facebook group, so it’s very simple, but its still requires some effort.

Anything and everything – tell us about your experience!

Sarah:
First of all, it was very surprising for me how personal the videos are, because you’re there and you’re present and you’re not just going through movements silently, you’re talking. It feels like a connection, a moment of openness, and vulnerability. I know that for me that the first week was actually the most difficult. I had a lot of work, and I went back to it a couple of times because I felt like that was a huge piece of the work. How to start, how to clean the slate, how to be centered, how to be present, it was a big deal for me, this one.

I was very surprised when I started. I really didn’t expect… you don’t know what to expect. It’s so new, it’s so different – it’s not yoga, it’s not chanting, it’s not meditation. It’s completely revolutionary! (laughter). Seriously.

Liz:
I love to hear that, and it is. When it’s your own work it feels weird to say things like, “It’s revolutionary.” But when you hear other people reflect it back to you, you’re like, “Damn Right it is!” (laughter)

Sarah:
It’s ‘cause it’s completely fresh, and re-freshing! The fact that you’re there and that you feel… You know like when you go to a meditation class and there’s a teacher and she’s like all, “aaaaawwwwhhh” (makes angel singing noise). (laughter).

But you have Liz on your video, and you’re laughing, and you’re talking and you’re being a person. And you’re real, and you’re raw, and there’s something about you just being just a girl – but on a mission. That makes you a leader, and that makes us be able to see ourselves doing this work. This is not impossible.

And the fact that you talk is not only entertaining – first of all, it lets you get out of your own head. Because in a lot of yoga they say to stop thinking, but you can’t. As soon as somebody says, “stop thinking” you’re just thinking. When somebody is talking, you’re listening. And when you’re listening you’re not necessarily thinking.

To have you talk to us and motivate us and go through the things with us, makes us be able to get out of our own head and be in the moment, be present – it’s really something else.

My first reaction was that I was completely surprised, and that it was accessible, but it was work. It’s not a “party on the beach” type of thing, it’s work. You ask us to do some real work, and there’s growth expected. Not expected, but involved. It’s easier than you might think, and then again it’s a little hard also, because you get through the nitty-gritty stuff, you point to the stuff that maybe hard, maybe it’s uncomfortable.

Liz:
Yeah! I’m really glad you brought that up, because at many points throughout summer session, and you saw in the Facebook group, women would hit against a wall. They’d reach a week, and the mantra would just be something that’s just like, “Oh my god, I don’t want to look at this” or “Oh my god, this is painful.” But what’s cool is that they could come into the Facebook group and see that they weren’t alone. Some people would be like, “Me too!”

I love what you said about going back to week one when you needed to. Because even though there’s structure for 12 weeks, it’s also not – there’s permission within the program for people to take it at their own pace, stay with one video if that’s what they felt like they needed, skip a video, come back if they needed to. I’m glad to hear you say that you did that and that worked well for you.

Sarah:
It really did. Week one was, really for me, what I needed to work on. Yeah.

Liz:
Which is great, because everyone is going to be different – that’s cool. Sorry I think you were saying something.

Sarah:
That’s why I think i’ll go back to it forever. I’ll go back to this mantra forever. There’s something really deep inside my core that is holding on and this one specific mantra was the one that I really needed to incorporate in everything in life.

That’s the thing, you do the work, you do the exercises, and then you have your week. In your week, you incorporate your mantra, and you see it everywhere, and then you see it happen.

I don’t want to sound woo-woo, but there is magic that happens where your mantra just appears in front of you during that week. You have this mantra, and you hold it in your head, and then it happens, it’s in front of you, it presents itself. It’s like, “Hi, its me, are you going to do it? Here’s the opportunity! Do it!” Every single week for me, it was like this. Every week, it’s presented itself – “Hi, here I am.”

Liz:
Just like anything you put attention or energy towards, it’s going to expand and you’re going to call into your presence and your reality. I would love to know specifically, you don’t have to go into each one, maybe the one that was the most impactful for you. I would love to know how your relationship with yourself has shifted in any context that is most important to you. So whether it’s how you feel in or about your body, how you relate to food or movement, and even in your professional or family life. How have you experienced shifts in any of those things?

Sarah:
You know the thing is that I wasn’t even able – you see how I’m wordy – I was always talking on the website, talking on the facebook group, emailing, blablablablabla – and then something happened, and I just said, “I’m so humbled by the shift” that I couldn’t even put it into words.

It’s something so sacred and mystical that’s happening to me that at the same time I can’t wait to be able to share it with the girls, and I have to, and now is the time that I need to. My post is going to be like three pages. I’m going to break Facebook. (laughter)

Liz:
Break Facebook, you said! (laughter)

Sarah:
I am! I have to tell the girls, I have to tell them, I can’t wait to share it with them. First of all, right now, I’m feeling like teary. What has changed? What has not fucking changed? What hasn’t? That list is shorter! (laughter)

My relationship with my body, first of all, became one of acceptance. It’s not even like, “My body has changed and now my boobs are perky.” No, it’s still the same boobs, but now I look at them and I don’t look at them with the same eyes. It’s like my eyes have changed. My perception of myself. It’s not even my perception of myself, it’s the acceptance of what is – which is like so basic, and you could tell somebody, “You just have to accept yourself,” but they can’t do it because it’s much deeper. You have to dig through a whole dark nook of your psyche to see where your darkness was hurting you. And I did that. I’m 37, so i’m young and i’m not. I’m at that age where I’m super young and I’m super not young. But I feel super new.

Liz:
Oh, I love that!

Sarah:
I feel new, and I know it’s the same me. I did look, I didn’t lose one gram.
I thought I was fat, but now I know I’m not fat. Even if I were, I don’t even really care.

For sure my relationship to food has changed, because I addressed somethings that were going on with my health that I wasn’t able to address and to tackle before. So now I started last week a full alkaline diet, which I was never even able to look at – it’s really rough, I’m only eating fruits and veggies now for the next 21 days, except for some minor exceptions.

It’s something I was never even able to address – what food was doing to my health. Not necessarily to how I look or my ass, but to my health.

And now it’s like my body and my mind and my soul just merge. Where there was separation before – my soul was right there and my mind was there and my body was another thing – now it’s just like one. It’s really fun. It’s a huge shift.

Career, creativity, honestly Liz your work….can you tell Danielle LaPorte that I said your work is the best compliment to her work. I feel like I had my Core Desire Feelings, and I knew how I wanted to feel, and now I feel that. Do you know what I mean?

Liz:
That’s cool! The embodiment piece. You got to move through them.

Sarah:
Yeah and it’s like all the things that were separating me from the way I wanted to feel, I threw to the trash.
And I was safe to throw them to the trash. A lot of fear has dissipated.
And I’m not a fearful person. People like my friends or family would say, “What, fearful? No, she’s not fearful.” I’m not somebody who’s like shy or fearful of situations. I tackle things. But when it comes to your soul and to your personal work, there’s a lot that people don’t see on the outside that goes on with yourself. Before you feel at peace and centered, there’s a lot of work to do.

That work was a huge part of me feeling, maybe the part, of me feeling how I feel today – which is really fucking awesome.

Liz:
I love that, and I’ll ask you one more question, because I think some people might be wondering this, because you’ve mentioned several times that it is a lot of work. It’s deep work and for everyone it really is going to be different, but if you had to quantify the time that you spent on WSM this summer, what would you say if you had to just estimate how many hours per week or day or anything like that.

Sarah:
The videos I would say, I did them sometimes once, sometimes twice – the videos are about 60 minutes long. I would say for the videos you spend like maybe 2 hours a week. Then the journaling is not that long, because I like dumping myself in a journal rather than thinking – so 10 or 15 minutes on the journaling. The Facebook group, you know when you exercise and you need water and you drink – so I don’t know how much time I spent on the Facebook group. Sometimes more, some weeks more than others.

I would say like an average of two and a half hours a week of actual physical work, but then what goes on – it’s all week long. I think it’s safe to say that it’s a 12 week program, and that the whole week, even if you’re not watching the videos, doing the exercises, there is work happening. It’s like your muscles, you go to the gym and your muscles are still working after the gym, it’s the same thing.

Liz:
Yup. That’s a great assesment, thank you. So Sarah, was there anything else, any other part of your story that I didn’t ask you about that you wanted to share before we sign off?

Sarah:
I don’t know, no. I will share the full-length breaking Facebook story sometime this week when I have time to write it.

For sure all I wanted to do is say Thank You and to say I feel super privileged to have been a part of it. I can’t wait to go back to it, and to be again a part of it, again and again and again, because it’s just like a life commitment – not commitment, but it’s a love-story.

Liz:
It is a love story. I love that, that makes me so happy. It is. It’s a love story of falling in love with yourself, that’s true.

Sarah:
It is, and falling in love with the work that you created. It’s like, really honestly Liz, you’re an artist and you make a piece of art that’s really great, because it’s interactive. It’s better than performance art, because everybody gets to be a part of it and you can change the world. It’s pretty fucking awesome. You should be really, really proud of yourself.

Liz:
I’m actually typing that out, what you just said, because it’s probably one of the best things anyone’s ever said to me in my life.

Sarah, thank you so much for your time in the program, for your time in this interview, for all the time that you’ve given the women in the community as well, for the time you’ve given yourself.

It means so much to me to hear your story – it’s so nice to hear your voice, to see you on Facebook all summer and get your emails and I know you made the youtube video for the scholarship contest with Ashley. Talking to you, for me, has been really fun and enjoyable.

Sarah:
Sending you such a big virtual hug right now. Thank you.

Liz:
Hopefully I’ll be able to do some events up in Canada at some point next year and get to hug you in real life. I’m gonna let you go, thank you again. Can’t wait for your story in the Facebook group this week.

Sarah:
Ok, sending you so much love. Bye!

Liz:
Thank you! Bye!

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