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The Four Elements to Connect With and Cultivate Your Feminine

Photo Jun 02

This is the first installment in a 10-part series I did from May – August this year to do a more thorough exploration of some of the topics that come up most consistently on the podcast. Each blog post has a corresponding Facebook Live video that posted the week before. The reason for both is everyone learns differently.

I’ve also created a cheat sheet with some master notes for easy reference if this is an exploration you choose to continue on your own beyond these resources. You can get it here.

Today’s topic, connecting with and cultivating your feminine comes up A LOT on the podcast.

Before we dive in there’s a few important points I want to emphasize:

• This is not a conversation about gender, it’s a conversation about self-knowledge, self-understanding, and self-expression. That’s not to deny gender, it’s just to ask that you not be distracted by it and miss the valuable information here.

• Doing the work to understand yourself better is an incredibly efficient path to growth that creates more respect, compassion for and understanding of differences within ourselves and between ourselves and others.

• Using words to describe the feminine is kind of a paradox, as words and language in themselves are a structure (masculine) so take what resonates for you and don’t worry about the rest.

• The identity we are talking about here is your energetic identity. This is not about male/female though I understand the brain may have trouble separating masculine and feminine from male and female, but humans are intelligent and the mind is complex. I believe we are all are highly capable of making the distinction.

Overall, my aim here is to keep things really grounded and simple, not overly complicated or super woo-woo. The purpose of this post is to connect and cultivate, which means there no quick fixes or “easy steps,” but there are practices and explorations to pique your curiosity.

The Four Elements:

1. Your sacred body:

Your body corresponds to the feminine element of the earth (mother earth, mother nature, flowers, trees, ocean, etc). So get out and be in nature, whatever forms of nature resonate for you. Explore sensuality, grounding, embodiment, and listening. Sensuality does not equal sexuality; it’s about engaging with all of your senses and noticing what your body is telling you. Learn your body’s unique language of the senses.

Grounding yourself daily is an enormously beneficial practice beyond connecting to and cultivating your feminine. Watch this video to learn how. Some other ways to ground include:

-take your shoes off and put your feet on the earth,
-lean into a tree,
-lay on the ground,
-put your toes in the sand,
-get in the ocean,
-sit on a rock, or even hold rocks in both of your hands,
-visit the mountains or a forest

Embodiment is a word that gets thrown around a lot these days but can feel a bit nebulous. Put simply being in your body is about presence with your physical self and getting the mind and the body synced up. Movement is one of the best ways to foster this connection between the mind, the body. (Note: Two whole posts and videos in this series will be dedicated to embodiment so stay tuned for more on that!)

Finally, when it comes to listening, once you are more connected to your sensuality, grounded and embodied, listening to your intuition becomes much easier.

2. Your thoughts, language, knowledge, and understanding:

The realm of the mind, corresponds to masculine element of air. We include masculine elements in the cultivation of the feminine because you can’t have one without the other – they complement and support each other.

To employ the mind specifically regarding connecting to and cultivating your feminine, explore your day to day thoughts and ideas, particularly around women, womanhood, and feminine energy. Specifically follow your curiosity around the Divine, Sacred, or Wild Feminine; feminine archetypes, goddesses, Mother Mary, etc.

In the cheat sheet I created for you here, I included a recommended reading list as well as some of my favorite oracle decks to get you started on or help deepen your exploration.

3. Your inner world and emotional landscape

Your inner world and emotional landscape correspond to the feminine element of water. Water can range from calm to energizing, peaceful to deep, dark and chaotic, and everything in between. Just like the bodies of water change and tides rise and fall, our emotions do the same so it’s not possible to get stuck in one emotion. Explore giving yourself permission to feel all of your feelings. Do some research on emotional intelligence (what to do with your emotions when they come up) and emotional literacy (the ability to name and identify your feelings and emotions).

And since we experience emotions in our bodies, a constant and great guiding question for this element is, “What do I feel and where do I feel it?”

4. Your unique passion and expression

Your unique passion and expression correspond to the masculine element of fire. Fire is creative, destructive, transformative; it transmutes the other elements, purifies, and penetrates. Passion and expression largely correlated to our creativity. Think about and explore things that inspire you creatively, give you goosebumps or make you cry. Dance, poetry, spoken word, painting, drawing, performance – things like fire ceremonies or rituals – you could be the creator of it or take them in.


If you haven’t already, watch the full video on this topic here:

You’ve got A LOT to consider now.

Don’t try to consider it all at once. Begin your exploration by feeling into which element most resonates for you right now. Then pick ONE aspect of the element to explore and practice with, then let your curiosity lead you from there. If you try to tackle all of this at once, you could get overwhelmed.

Remember to grab your cheat sheet here for the reading list and a few extra goodies too.



The Four Elements to Connect With and Cultivate Your Feminine