40 Lessons In 40 Years Part 2

by | Aug 28, 2023 | Discernment

40 Lessons In 40 Years Part 2

Lessons 11 through 20 in my “40 Lessons in 40 Years” series all stem from one overarching theme: lead with curiosity. When I get curious with myself and the world around me, there’s so much potential for compassion, healing, and discovery.

In this episode, I reflect on some of my deepest liberatory practices, including not taking things personally, prioritizing people who can respect me, and honoring the orientation of my soul. All of the lessons mentioned in this series are extracted from lived experiences, either my own or those around me, so I’d love to hear what resonates with you. See you back here next week for lessons number 21 to 30!


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In episode 438 of the Embodied Podcast we discuss:

(0:47) Lesson #11: Allowing other people to have their own experiences is one of the most liberating practices that any of us can ever have.

(4:32) Lesson #12: Don’t take things personally, or make things about you.

(7:03) Lesson #13: Chronological age doesn’t guarantee or determine as much as we think it should, would or does towards people’s maturity.

(8:33) Lesson #14: None of us should waste our time with people who don’t respect us. 

(10:32) Lesson #15: Give the most time to people who see, honor, cherish, revere, and respect you for who you really are.

(15:27) Lesson #16: If any part of your identity is part of a norm, it’s very important for you to learn about the lived experiences, and gain some insight and competence about the experiences of those who aren’t part of the same norm that you are. 

(18:22) Lesson #17: Money is important for survival, but it ain’t all that. 

(20:27) Lesson #18: Younger souls are here to manifest and older souls are here to serve God.

(24:10) Lesson #19: Accepting who and where you are, and accepting responsibility for your life, is also a liberatory practice.

(26:32) Lesson #20: Sometimes it’s helpful to learn the rules so you can break them.

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Quotes from this Week’s Episode of the Embodied Podcast: 

  • What makes our response to other people’s suffering selfish is when it comes from an inability, or a low capacity, or an intolerance for being with our own discomfort watching other people struggle. 
  • People will waste our time because they’re trying to get validated. They want to be seen, they want to be approved, or they want gold stars for whatever it is that they’re doing. It’s not our job to give that to people all the time in all the ways that they want it. 
  • When I have genuinely done something that deserves an apology, it is just such a deep relief to me that I can repair and acknowledge, and that it’s been brought into my attention that there is something I need to apologize for. 
  • We’re not dismantling something if we don’t know how it works. 
  • There are so many things in life that make us valuable and that are worth valuing. There are so many places within us where true, genuine power comes from that have absolutely nothing to do with money, status, stuff, or even influence.
  • You only have so much time, energy and attention to give, so be wise and discerning about where you’re putting it.

How was this episode for you?

Was this episode helpful for you today? I’d love to know what quote or lesson touched your soul. Let me know in the comments below OR share the episode on Instagram, tag me your stories @elizabethdialto, or send me a DM!

About the Embodied Podcast with Elizabeth DiAlto

Since 2013 I’ve been developing a body of work that helps women embody self-love, healing, and wholeness. We do this by focusing on the four levels of consciousness – physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual.

In practical terms, this looks like exploring tools and practices to help you tune into the deep wisdom of the body and the knowing of the heart, which I believe are gateways to our souls. Then we cultivate a new relationship with our minds that allows the mind to serve this wisdom and knowledge and soul connection, rather than override it, which is what many of us were taught.

If you’ve been doing self-help or spiritual development work for a while, these are the types of foundational things that often people overlook in pursuit of fancier concepts that often aren’t practical or sustainable. Here, we will focus on building these strong foundations so you can honestly and thoroughly embody self-love. If you’re feeling it, subscribe to the show, and leave us a review wherever you listen from. You can also keep up with show updates and community discussions on Instagram here.

Transcript for Episode 438 “40 Lessons in 40 Years Part 2“:

Elizabeth DiAlto  00:00

Sometimes it’s helpful to learn the rules, so you can break them understand how a thing works, so you can subvert it

Elizabeth DiAlto  00:15

What’s up everybody? Welcome to episode number 438 of The Embody Podcast. I am your host, Elizabeth DiAlto. And today we are kicking off part two of a four part series called 40 lessons in 40 years, these are not sequential episodes, you do not need to have heard the first 10 for lessons number 11 to 20 that we’re going to be covering today to make sense. I will say though, that lesson number 11 That we’re starting out the episode with today, if I had to rank them, this might be number one, it’s at least for sure, in the top three.

Elizabeth DiAlto  00:47

And the first lesson is allowing other people to have their own experiences is one of the most liberating practices that any of us can ever have. For those of you who identify as empathic people. If you’ve ever been or you know, continue to kind of like deal with or unravel or heal from a codependent upbringing, or tendencies to be codependent, if you’re someone who’s like an over function, or over giver over extender. And you know, just someone who tends towards or has in the past tended towards doing more than your part, right, picking up other people’s slack, cleaning up other people’s messes, rescuing people from themselves. The thing about all of that is it comes from such a loving place, right? We see people suffering, but what makes our response to other people’s suffering selfish, is when it comes from an inability or a low capacity, or an intolerance for being with our own discomfort, watching other people struggle. 

Elizabeth DiAlto  01:56

Because something I say all the time in so many different contexts is just because you can doesn’t mean you should. So if you could do something that in your assessment, you think would lessen somebody else’s burden, or take something off their plate, there’s a really easy way to decide whether or not you should do that. Ask them if they want you to. Don’t just jump in. And here’s the thing, might some people who could actually use your help say no, yes. But if they say no, that’s their journey, they need to work on their receptivity, or they need to work on letting people in, right? Like there’s just so many things in life that could be solved by consent, by checking by asking by not assuming you know, whether that you know what’s happening or that you know, what’s better, and so allowing other people to have their own experiences. Part of that is, again, not making assumptions or not having expectations or not thinking you know, more than you likely even can. 

Elizabeth DiAlto  03:06

Because there’s always so much going on, behind the scenes or below the surface with people that we’re not aware of, that we’re not informed about. Especially when it’s people that you’re not that close with, you know, and so again, allowing other people to have their own experiences. If you feel an urge to like help or support, offer, ask, don’t just do it. What this does is it respects people’s journey, it respects their personhood, it respects their divine nature, because I’m sure you can relate in your own life. How many things have been miraculous in retrospect, because they allowed you to really break free from something, break a pattern, break the trauma, or the lineage that you come from a way of being that if somebody had jumped in and interrupted your journey or your process, you wouldn’t be able to do it. Or maybe it would have taken longer, because you would have had to have another shitty experience that nobody jumped in and interrupted. So again, I could go on and on about why it’s important to allow other people to have their own experiences. And again, that the part of it that says, if you do want to help, there’s nothing wrong with wanting to help but just ask people, and then let their response determine how involved you actually get. So I love this one. It’s so important. 

Elizabeth DiAlto  04:32

And then this next one, lesson number 12. Not taking things personally, or making things about you. This is one of the Four Agreements. If any of you have ever read The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz, this changed my life. I mean over a decade, 12 years ago, I don’t even remember the first time I read that book, but it helps us to realize which this is a really important one, especially for people who are on healing and growth journeys. People who tend to be self reflective and are Oh, is open for transformation, transmutation and shifting and growing, changing, doing things differently. It can be really easy to live under a magnifying glass or do what people call navel gazing, where you just constantly making everything about you, where you’re taking things personally, when everything is about how it makes you feel or what you think, when there’s truly so so, so much that is happening, including, like how people are reacting or responding to you or communicating with you, that actually has nothing to do with you.

Elizabeth DiAlto  05:35

And again, so there’s like an overarching lesson that I’m like, I’m like sprinkling in an added lesson here. That’s super relevant to these first two today, ask, ask like, be curious. Right? Leading with curiosity. I don’t that’s probably one of these lessons. I don’t know if I said it last week, or if it’s coming further down the page. I wrote these down a while ago. But if you have to find yourself taking something personally, a great way to interrupt yourself is to go you know what, before I assume that this is about me, let me ask a question. And it just gives people that opportunity. Like there’s nothing wrong with getting clarification. There’s nothing wrong with owning that and saying to someone, you know what, I’m taking this real personally. And so I just want to check in, like, why did you say that? Or why did you do that that way? Or why did you respond this way? Like, is this about me? Is there something I need to know? Do we need to have a conversation?

Elizabeth DiAlto  06:23

Not taking things personally, is part of taking responsibility for yourself and taking responsibility for your own life? Right? Because when we take things personally, we are not looking at the full picture, we’re not even open or curious or available, to what factors might be contributing to a situation that has made it occur the way it did. And so again, to be more collectively oriented, rather than individually oriented is another way to look at this, right? Just like everything is not about me, that might have had nothing even to do with me. And if you really feel like you need or want to know, again, ask a question.

Elizabeth DiAlto  07:03

Lesson number 13. This is about maturity. And this is a lesson I came by a couple of different ways through my relationships with people in my family, are the older generation, older generations and my family, a lot of dating because I’ve dated people older than me, and even in my friendships, and even in my community, even with clients and students. Because I’ve always had a lot of people around me that are significantly older than me a decade, two decades, sometimes even more than that, chronological age doesn’t guarantee or determine as much as we think it should or would or does towards people’s maturity. Right? Just because someone is older doesn’t mean that they’re wiser. Right? It just It all depends. It depends on how someone has lived their life, it depends on if they’ve done any personal work again, healing, growth, transformation, liberation work, people being older, will never guarantee that they behave better.

Elizabeth DiAlto  08:02

What’s also cool is that anyone at any age can change. Not everyone is gonna, but certainly anybody can. It’s just that we can’t assume because it’s like old school thinking right? Like even even the adage of like respecting your elders, it’s like, okay, but do they act respectfully, because I’m not just going to blindly dish out respect for people or, or on the spectrum of what is like respect and disrespect. I’m also not going to acquiesce to people just because they’re older than me, if they’re not behaving in a responsible way.

Elizabeth DiAlto  08:33

Number 14 is none of us should waste our time with people who don’t respect us. Speaking of respect, there are so many ways in which people behave disrespectfully, they don’t respect our time, they don’t respect our energy, they might not respect our expertise are our skills are where we are in life, or what we’ve got going on our availability. There’s just so many different ways that people are genuinely disrespectful. And again, because so many people are out here, doing a couple of things that we already talked about in this episode, not allowing other people to have their own experiences, or out here being immature or unevolved out here taking things personally, or just being so self centered, right, making things about them that really aren’t about them.

Elizabeth DiAlto  09:23

People will waste our time because they’re trying to get validated. They want to be seen, they want to be approved of they want gold stars for whatever it is that they’re doing. And it’s just like not our job to be given that to people all the time, in all the ways that they want it. And so this is where people can do like, either intentional or unconscious, intentional or unintentional conscious or unconscious stuff to like, target our attention or put our energy and ultimately that’s not respectful. It’s not respectful of our sovereignty. And, again, they’re trying to get stuff from us that they really should be seeking to get from themselves or if they have a spiritual orientation from the Divine.

Elizabeth DiAlto  10:09

And just because someone is in a place of feeling insecure, or they’re coming from a traumatized or a wounded place, even because that makes it harder, right? When we know that people are like hurting or they’re having a hard time, still doesn’t mean that they deserve our time. Right, it still doesn’t mean that we have to go out of our way, when the way that they’re going about getting their needs met, is disrespectful.

Elizabeth DiAlto  10:32

Lesson number 15. Related on the opposite end of Lesson number 14, give the most time to people who see honor, cherish and revere you and respect you for who you really are. That is going to be the most nourishing thing to your human to your soul. And some people mix up or conflate compassion, or generosity, with needing to just give without discernment to anyone and everyone who needs anything. And that’s a great way to burn yourself out. And so it really is okay to have discernment markers are have barometers for how much time energy and attention or resources or whatever that you share with people. And I’ll give you an example. I realized this many years ago, I have a lot of friends who were very amazing. Mystics and healers. And just like very, very self aware, incredible humans.

Elizabeth DiAlto  11:34

If you listen to this in this podcast, you know I’ve interviewed so many that people I’ve interviewed on the show have been dear friends of mine. So you know this. And when it comes to close friendships, I realized that, you know, I had to think for a long time, I would let people get closer than was appropriate. And I realized over the years, that the people who I could allow into like my innermost circle, in whatever life category, right, whether that’s romantically, whether that’s personal friendships, relationships, whether that’s students, clients, or whatever, it can really only be the people who are self contained on a level, right? Like, it’s totally fine to need support, depending on the context will look different for people. But people who cannot contain themselves can’t like handle their own shit to a level, that they’re not always like dumping on you.

Elizabeth DiAlto  12:24

Or just like needing more than you have to give an either again, trying to go about getting their needs met in these, you know, manipulative, covert, unhealthy or dysfunctional ways. Those people don’t see you or they can’t, right, because often, people who don’t see us who can’t honor us who can’t respect us, it’s because they’re not able to do those things for themselves, so they can’t fathom offering it to someone else. They also can’t fathom that someone else could be having an experience much, much, much, much different from theirs, because they just can’t relate like it’s just like, it’s not in their purview. It’s not in their perception, they just don’t have access to it as a real thing. And so even when we say things like this, we’re essentially we’re saying, you know, some people don’t deserve as much of your time some people absolutely deserve as much of your time as you want to give and as you have to give, we’re not knocking any of those people on either end.

Elizabeth DiAlto  13:22

We’re not like whether someone is worthy of your time or not, doesn’t mean they’re, they’re worthy of like love or respect or care or not. It’s just a matter of, we only have so much time, energy and attention to give. So to be wise and to be discerning about where you’re putting it is really important for your own. All the health physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health

Elizabeth DiAlto  13:47

Hello, everybody quick break in the show. And if you’re hearing this commercial, it is leading up to September 2023, where we are celebrating two things longtime listeners and followers know that every year around my birthday, which is September 14, I always like to do some kind of birthday sale or some kind of birthday offering. This year we also happen to be celebrating the 10 year anniversary of the School of sacred embodiment. So it is a double exciting celebration this year coming in September, two things that I am releasing that I am super excited about. Can I say the word exciting. Any more times in this little announcement are the cherish retreat, which is happening in the fall of 2024. This is going to be a retreat about self love and body love and reverence. It will be happening in southern Spain, October 31 to November 6 2024. If you want the details about that retreat, and if you want to receive like the first offer, which is going to include a discount of 10% for the 10 year anniversary of the School of sacred embodiment. Get yourself on the retreat interest list by going to untamed yourself.com forward slash retreat dash interest, and as well, I will be launching my body love and reverence course in September, you do not need to get on an interest list for that I will be announcing that far and wide and giving everyone and anyone an opportunity to join that. And that’s it, y’all, the birthday anniversary celebrations are coming, stay tuned, they begin on September 18.

Elizabeth DiAlto  15:27

Number 16 is if you are part of any norm, and I’m putting norm in air quotes, if you’re part of any dominant cultural group, and again, this can be different depending on where you are. You know, in the United States, there’s very clearly specific things what that means, and probably more so in the Western world. But you know, there are certainly some universal things, but I’m not going to get into the nitty gritty of what that means. I’m just going to say if you’re part of a norm, if any part of your identity is part of a norm, it’s really very important for you to learn about the experiences, the lived experiences, and gain some insight and competence around the experiences of those who aren’t part of the norm, that you are, right, this is just about being culturally and socially competent, to be able to acknowledge, you know, whether it’s related to privilege, or race, or education, or any kind of like status, or money or, you know, whatever.

Elizabeth DiAlto  16:36

Especially if you’re a person who lives among people and has to interact with folks, whether it’s in your personal life, your personal relationships, people who you work with, you know, people who you interact with in your community, if you’re just moving through life, thinking that your experience is how things are, that’s a really narrow view. And you’re really going to ostracize some people had an example of this a couple of months ago, a friend of mine, a white male friend of mine said something to me, that was so insensitive, and I’m not easily offended, well, person. And I wasn’t even offended. It was just that like, Dude, you fucking live in a place and you interact with people who are not white all the time. And if I’m your friend, and you’re saying this shit to me, I can’t even imagine what you might be saying to other people.

Elizabeth DiAlto  17:33

And as well, this had been like, the third or fourth time this person had said something to me, that was like, really insensitive, and I just so happened to actually have the energy on that particular day to be like, bra, not cool, like what the hell. And it’s, you know, again, especially if you’re someone in the United States who has a white identity, or a white male identity, again, like there’s just all kinds of experiences that you can imagine other people have, right. And it’s not to say there aren’t unique facets to any given person’s experiences based on their identity. But like, again, that’s why I say if you’re part of a norm, or if you’re part of a dominant group, just like learn something about other people’s experiences, so you could be out here being a much more like responsible and competent and caring citizen of your community and the world. 

Elizabeth DiAlto  18:22

Number 17 Is money is important for survival. But it ain’t all that there are so many things in life, that make us valuable, that are worth valuing. There are so many places within us where like real true genuine like power comes from. There are qualities that make people more powerful, genuinely like from their soul, based on their gifts, and how they’re built and who they really are. As a person. They have absolutely nothing to do with money that have absolutely nothing to do with status, or stuff, or even influence. When I was talking to a friend about this this morning, just this influencer culture that we’ve been living in and that we allow to continue for the last several years, is just it’s so mind boggling to me sometimes, because people place so much value on things that don’t actually matter. They’re such insubstantial things when you are actually operating from your soul. And it’s fascinating how when people are operating more from their ego, they can turn these things into the be all end all.

Elizabeth DiAlto  19:52

Like as if a person having more money than you means that they’re better than you. They might have a different skill set than you, they might be more skilled at certain things than you are okay? But as a whole human being, they’re better than you because they make more money. Like now. And again, I the reason I started this one out by saying money is very important for survival. Because again, we live in a capitalistic world, we all got to pay rent, we got to keep the lights on, we got to eat everything cost money. So it’s important, but it certainly doesn’t determine your value as a human being. 

Elizabeth DiAlto  20:27

Lesson number 18. I love this. And this, this lesson is really inspired by something Tosha silver talks about in her book, it’s not your money. Younger souls are here to manifest and learn Earth. They’re basically they’re here, they’re here to learn, like how to earth how do you live here? How do you be a person, right? Whereas older souls, those of us who’ve just been around for many, many, many, many more lifetimes, and especially lifetimes, during more ancient times less technologically advanced times, were more here to serve God. Were more here to merge with the divine where we’re more about that like heaven on earth life. And it’s not bad. It’s not good or bad to be a younger soul or an older soul. In some cases, you might not know you might not care, it might not matter to you. Each just is what it is.

Elizabeth DiAlto  21:29

But what’s interesting is, for anyone who does care to know I find I mentioned in last week’s podcast, how things like astrology and human design, I like those things. They remind us how complex we all are, how dynamic and unique and different we all are. I feel that way about this one, too. I remember, especially when I was living out in California, there’s a lot of people like very young souls, people running around out there thinking that they are just the most wise guru gifted people out here. And it’s very, it’s very entertaining, to watch. And in some cases, this kind of relates to the point I was making about money the last one semester, these people make so much money. Like if you look at some again, internet influencers, or even some of these, like life coaches are like spiritual guide type of people who make like millions and millions of dollars. And they’re very young, like they came here to manifest.

Elizabeth DiAlto  22:24

Like, that’s what they came here to do. And so they have no qualms about it. They have like, unobstructed belief in themselves. And in some cases, it’s also like blind entitlement, right? Like, there’s that meme that says maybe she’s born with it, maybe it’s privilege, those things could be a factor too. But it’s just interesting, because, and why this was an important lesson for me as an older soul person, is because for a while, I felt like a kind of way about myself that I just didn’t give a shit about all the like, manifesting and building wealth and all the things that some of my peers did. And I was like, oh, that’s just not my orientation. Remember, as before the pandemic, so maybe like 2019, or 2018, I was listening to social Silver’s book, and she was talking about that. And I’m like, Oh, this makes sense. Like, I feel so much more deeply satisfied, doing like, my spiritual work and spiritual practices, and so much more, just seen and validated and satisfied and satiated by just seeing like the fruits of my devotional practices come through in my life and all in like, a variety of ways.

Elizabeth DiAlto  23:31

And, you know, it’s cool when that’s related to money. But that’s just like, not usually the thing that I get, like, super, super excited about. And the people out there, a lot of these teachers out here, who are teaching people, like your net worth, is your self worth and stuff like that. Those are those young souls because it might actually work that way for them. I don’t believe that’s true for anybody. But that might be their orientation, that might be their belief. And if that’s their belief, like nothing’s gonna stop them. And if that’s where they’re manifesting from, that’s cool. But like, if that’s not where you want to manifest from, if that doesn’t let you up, like, there’s nothing wrong with you. You don’t have low self worth. That’s just not like the orientation of your soul. 

Elizabeth DiAlto  24:10

Number 19 is accepting who and where you are. And accepting responsibility for your life is also a liberatory practice. I was having a conversation with a friend of mine about apologizing, again, to reference we talked about this in a podcast a couple of weeks ago, Harriet Lerner’s TED talk about her book, Why won’t he apologize? I love apologizing when I’ve like legitimately done something wrong, right? Like sometimes people are trying to like extract an apology or make something our responsibility that isn’t because they feel a certain way and they just don’t want to deal with their own feelings. What I have genuinely done something that deserves an apology, and I am in the wrong and I need to apologize. It is just such a deep relief. If to me that I can repair that I can acknowledge that it’s been brought into my attention and awareness that there is something I need to apologize for. 

Elizabeth DiAlto  25:10

It feels like such a blessing to be trusted, to even be asked to apologize or for someone to share, like a violation or something. And again, there’s just there’s such a distinction between when there has actually been a violation. And when something is just, you know, someone wanting to put something on us because they’re not feeling their own feelings or whatever. But taking responsibility accepting, like, here’s where I’m at, or, and not thinking that you’re above anything, no matter where you are, no matter how spiritual you are, how like, evolved you are, or whatever, like, we’re still all people, we’re all still going to have moments. So I love that a lot. I love being able to be like, damn, I really did. I really did mess up. I’m so sorry about that, you know, anything, any other kind of repair, that needs to be done taking responsibility?

Elizabeth DiAlto  26:01

To me, I don’t know, I don’t know what to say about other than, it just feels so good. Because it feels correct. Honestly, I think that’s what it is. And also, as a person who’s had so many people in my life, who could not take responsibility for themselves. I think that’s why it feels so good. To me, it feels so good to me, to be able to extend something to someone that I so frequently didn’t get when I needed it. I really know and appreciate how good it feels when it’s real and appropriate. And I’m always so happy to do that.

Elizabeth DiAlto  26:32

And then here we are, we’re already at lesson number 20. Sometimes it’s helpful to learn the rules, so you can break them understand how a thing works. So you can subvert it. This I have found to be so important in actual justice and liberation work, especially, but also healing work. And also trauma work, when we can understand the root causes of things, right. So when I say the rules, you know, a lot of our culture and a lot of our society is built on rules. We don’t have to live by those rules. That’s why I say you learn the rules, so you could break them. But when you don’t know what the rules are, you can’t be as strategically subversive. Right? You can be ignorantly subversive, you could just be rebellious. But when I say being strategically subversive, we’re not dismantling something if we don’t know how it works, right? Like, you have to look at how something functions in order to be like, cool, I want to take that apart. And then I want to make something better. If you’re going to do that, you do need to know how something works.

Elizabeth DiAlto  27:47

And so that phrase, you got to learn the rules, so you can break them, you also have to learn the rules. So you can see like, most things rarely need to be completely tossed away in their entirety. There’s good bones, there’s good elements to so many things. And we could keep that stuff, right. We live in a culture again, where you know, cancel culture, or just people want to just like toss away humans, toss away systems, because a lot of people don’t think broadly enough. They don’t think in terms of systems, they don’t like zoom out and look at well, if I just say I want to pull out this one piece of a thing. They’re not looking at it like Jenga, they’re not realizing, well, if I just pull out that one thing I don’t like maybe a whole bunch of other things come crashing down. Because something needs to go in its place. Right?

Elizabeth DiAlto  28:36

So learning the rules, so you can break them as also about critical thinking. It’s also about understanding how something works. So if you want to do it differently, if you don’t like the way it’s done, what does that saying about like, if you don’t learn your history, it’s doomed to repeat itself. You know, that’s part of it. That’s part of why even in modern times, we end up with just more of the same because people haven’t actually taken the time to go, Well, why didn’t that thing work? What were the rules? What are the rules of engagement? How can I do something differently?

Elizabeth DiAlto  29:07

So thank you again, so much for listening. I hope you enjoyed the lessons if anything resonates great if anything doesn’t resonate. Also great like my life lessons don’t have to be your life lessons. But if you got anything out of any of them, I love to hear from you. You could always email us at Hello at untamed yourself.com You could share the episode wherever or however it is that you share things with people. And if you’re in our free mighty networks group, we do a post every Monday so we could geek out together about the podcast that and everything else if you need links to things are untamed yourself.com forward slash links, a reminder about the free 90 network space that is a space for women only. So if you’re a woman and you want to check that out, please do you’re all welcome. And that’s it. We’ll be back next week with lessons number 21 to 30