There’s a lot of fresh, new beginning energy swirling around as we step into the spring equinox. Coming out of this cocoon season has opened me up to receive intentions from my ancestors and divine support squad, and I’ve been really sitting with the messages they’ve been sending me lately.
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The first is one is around the multiplicity of connection, intimacy, and creativity. Where can I find more joy in the rewards of being who I truly am, especially when there’s a hefty tax to living an alternative lifestyle? I’ve been thinking a lot about community, demonstrating ethics of care, and both knowing what’s enough and being okay with it rather than always striving for more.
The other intention that I’ve been playing around with is inviting next-level/renewed power and strength in my physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health. I’m experimenting with how I can set my life up to be as enjoyable and pain-free as possible, which requires me to reintegrate movement and nutrition in a new way.
I hope these intentions can illuminate something relevant, important, or relatable for you, too!
In episode 420 of the Embodied Podcast we discuss:
(1:39) Reflecting on the spring equinox and Pisces season
(6:26) One of the biggest takeaways that I got out of the Real Uplevel series
(8:53) Discovering your contribution and doing what’s yours to do
(14:29) Receiving the intention for multiplicity of connection, intimacy, and creativity
(18:41) Taking an honest audit of my habits of consumption and accumulation
(21:37) Next level/renewed power and strength (physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual)
(25:02) Insights from a recent cleanse that I did
(30:42) Recognizing that alignment requires effort
(35:26) Connecting to the real power of your soul
Resources mentioned by Elizabeth in the episode:
- Women Without Kids – Episode 9. Creation, Contribution, and Collectivism with adrienne maree brown
- Episode 367. Rewire Your Money Mindset
Work with me:
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- Catch the full show notes for episode 420 here
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Quotes from this Week’s Episode of the Embodied Podcast:
- There’s such a huge pressure for those of us who really care about the world and the collective. It can often feel like we’re not doing enough, but there’s no way any of us can do as much as we wish we could.
- What are the different things that you need to feel seen, held, and supported? And then who are the people in your life that help you do all of those things, and how do you reciprocate those feelings for them?
- When we prioritize the values of connection and intimacy, then we can really demonstrate an ethic of care.
- How does my body want to be going into my 40s? What’s going to be sustainable? And how do I set myself up for the rest of my life to be as enjoyable and pain-free as possible?
- One of the ways that the spirituality and personal development industry does us a big disservice is by convincing us that everything is supposed to feel good, and if it doesn’t, we’re doing something wrong. Alignment actually requires a lot of effort. When you’re in alignment, yes, things will flow better. But it doesn’t mean that you only get to do things that you want to do.
How was this episode for you?
Was this episode helpful for you today? I’d love to know what quote or lesson touched your soul. Let me know in the comments below OR share the episode on Instagram, tag me your stories @elizabethdialto, or send me a DM!
About the Embodied Podcast with Elizabeth DiAlto
Since 2013 I’ve been developing a body of work that helps women embody self-love, healing, and wholeness. We do this by focusing on the four levels of consciousness – physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual.
In practical terms, this looks like exploring tools and practices to help you tune into the deep wisdom of the body and the knowing of the heart, which I believe are gateways to our souls. Then we cultivate a new relationship with our minds that allows the mind to serve this wisdom and knowledge and soul connection, rather than override it, which is what many of us were taught.
If you’ve been doing self-help or spiritual development work for a while, these are the types of foundational things that often people overlook in pursuit of fancier concepts that often aren’t practical or sustainable. Here, we will focus on building these strong foundations so you can honestly and thoroughly embody self-love. If you’re feeling it, subscribe to the show, and leave us a review wherever you listen from. You can also keep up with show updates and community discussions on Instagram here.
Transcript for Episode 418 “Why I Want To Be Bothered“:
Elizabeth DiAlto 00:00
But what’s like the real power of your soul that is meant to come through you in this lifetime that is meant to be like your gift, your contribution to humanity and the earth. And this, this beautiful place that we get to inhabit that. I know it can be a dumpster fire, but it’s also still so miraculous.
Elizabeth DiAlto 00:23
Hello, everybody, welcome to episode number 420 of the Embodied Podcast. Today is Monday, March 27. Which means that if you have already joined the real up level, you should have gotten an email this morning with the first video in your inbox, as well as access to our mighty networks portal. The interview series itself does not start until April 3. So another week until that, but we are getting ready to kick that thing off. So if you haven’t joined the real uplevel yet, and you’re a coach or healer, who’s interested in integrating and implementing more liberatory practices in your business, and not participating in the toxic cringy harmful nonsense in the coaching health and wellness and online business industries. Check out details for the series at the real up level.com. I have 17 amazing speakers, couple solo sessions, an amazing portal on mighty networks for us to have some community gatherings during the series, have some calls, check in process together, explore together, be an inquiry, learn grow, share, it’s gonna be great.
Elizabeth DiAlto 01:39
If you’re here for the episode today, which obviously you’re here for the episode today. I don’t have a script today I’m just riffing. Last week we had the spring equinox the astrological new year we had a new moon a lot of fresh new beginning energy going on. And personally I had been feeling that like spring cleaning like reorganize cleanse, kind of energy for like the whole month leading up to last week, I did a lot of organizing and rearranging in my apartment, got some new storage for my kitchen, I was geeking out I will say I’m not big on tick tock like I don’t really scroll tick tock, but I have some friends who do and they always share them on Instagram. So I got put onto a couple organizational like home organizational accounts on Tiktok. And that should is amazing to me, like the things people think of, to clean their houses to fold their clothes to maximize storage, it blows my mind. And it’s so cool. You know, I live in a one bedroom apartment, it’s pretty spacious and I have some decent storage, but I wasn’t like maximizing my storage. So with the help of some of these Tiktok geniuses, I’m really loving the new flow and the apartment.
Elizabeth DiAlto 02:52
And so I also wanted to chat today a little bit about new energy and intentions and things like that. Share some of mine with you, maybe invite you to refine yours or deepen into yours or maybe you already have some. If you want to share them with me. You can find me on Instagram at Elizabeth D alto, feel free to DM me or you can email us at Hello at untamed yourself.com. I really do like when I say those things, I really mean it. Like I can’t always respond to everyone. But I love getting your notes. And I love reading your messages because it’s just it’s so cool to know like what’s going on out there with you what’s going on with the community, especially if you listen to the podcast because having a podcast is such an incredible thing. You know, I get to share so much you all listen, I get notes about how these things help you and stuff like that.
Elizabeth DiAlto 03:38
But my friend Jill Coleman, who is in the real uplevel interview series, this actually came up during your interview, put me on to this term. It’s called parasocial relationships where like some of you probably feel like really close to me or like you know me, because you listen to this show, and I share a lot about my life and experiences and work and stuff like that. But I don’t know you and I like to know you. I like to know more about you. It actually helps me when I record these podcasts when I invite guests and stuff to be like, you know, know what’s going on with the listeners out there. So I can make sure that what we’re doing is useful, relevant, helpful, designed for you, inclusive of you in your life and what you’ve got going on.
Elizabeth DiAlto 04:24
So my goodness, I love the newness. I love the newness. I love Spring. I love winter. I mean I really do love all the seasons have their place, but it’s the shift in energies that I enjoy so much transitioning, and I have to say Pisces season is always one of my favorites, because my midheaven is in Pisces, for those of you that are into astrology, and then also Pisces and Virgo are opposites. So the full moon during Pisces season is in Virgo so I always It feels very personal and Pisces is a water sign. And I love I don’t have a lot of water in my chart, but I love water. I live near water and I love being in that season. Like going into the emotional, the depths, and you know, Pisces isn’t as going into the depths like Scorpio, for example. But that like that dreaminess, and there were a lot of dreams.
Elizabeth DiAlto 05:13
A lot of dreams, sparking materializing, expanding, rearranging, reorienting, during this past Pisces season, I almost said, I will sit during this past spicy season because of the way the words were coming out of my mouth. But I gotta tell you, it actually was pretty spicy. So this morning, I was on Instagram. And there was this great, beautiful post, by the way. Now, sometimes I don’t know if you do this, I read things online. And I don’t know if I’m saying it right. But this person’s Instagram handle looks like it’s you me healing, y o m e healing. And there’s a slide show that says normalize cycles, normalized, not needing to know the answer before you begin, normalize nonlinear ways of being, normalize talking highly about yourself, and normalize, less doing and more being, and I shared it. And I wrote, you know, fun facts, all of these things have been normalized in the School of sacred embodiment for years now. And I love that, and I’m really proud of that.
Elizabeth DiAlto 06:26
And it’s exciting because even coming out of doing the real up level interview series, having all of these conversations about liberation, with 18 different business owners, you know, there’s 17 interviews, because one of them was Jessica fish and Deseret Attaway, who are business partners, so I interviewed them together. But one of the biggest things that I got out of those conversations is just the deep, deep, deep anchoring and remembering, and commitment to remembering that the pressure that is put on individuals to solve systemic issues is a big, big, big part of the problem, right? Because some of us are out here feeling like, we need to care about all the things we need to be conscious about climate change, anti racism, anti capitalism, this is that be anti all these things, be busting up systems, burning down the fucking patriarchy or whatever, smashing the patriarchy what people like to say, doing better at fucking everything.
Elizabeth DiAlto 07:26
And we’re each only one person and many of us in our lives, because the way the systems and the structures are set up, already have like a lot on our plates, in some cases, more than any one person should have. And also, and this is something astrologically I’m excited about. As Pluto moved into Aquarius with that transit, people were describing it, as you know, it’s time to heal the village. And I really feel that because, you know, we talk we hear, I don’t really talk so much, you don’t really hear me talk so much about self care, as you hear me talk about self love. But community care is so important. And a lot of us don’t have that some people like really don’t have it at all. Some people just don’t have it to the extent that they need it. You know, I’m a person who would fall into, I don’t have it to the extent that I need it. I honestly don’t think most people do. I think most people need more community care and support and more of a village than almost anyone has.
Elizabeth DiAlto 08:24
I do have some friends who really have beautiful villages, structures and things like that. But a lot of us you know, especially with this digital age, especially those of us who can’t or don’t live near our families, we don’t have the support, you know, don’t have like, someone you could just call if you need something like can you quit? Can you run over? And some people do and that’s really beautiful. Others, there’s even more pressure because it’s like, if you need something, you have to hire someone to do it. And that’s, that could be such a strain for so many reasons.
Elizabeth DiAlto 08:53
So the conversation around doing what’s yours to do, right? Finding what is your contribution? That let’s put it that way? Like, what’s your contribution? This is one of the reasons I even did the real up level? Because it was like, Okay, what is the contribution that I could make that I am well built to offer? That could really help a lot of people, like as many people as possible that could reach far and wide and have quite a ripple effect. And I’m like, well, I could do an interview series. Well, I could write all these different people to talk about all these different things. And not that everyone listening to this series has to like, study all 17 conversations, like maybe two or three of the conversations are really going to hit home really resonate with someone and really help someone connect to what is their contribution, what is theirs to do, and what makes sense to maybe not focus on as much.
Elizabeth DiAlto 09:50
Because I think that’s a just such a huge pressure that those of us who really care about the world and care about the collective often feel is like we’re not doing enough But there’s no way any of us could do as much as so many of us wish we could. And that is something I just really want to remind people because when you burn yourself out, then you really can’t do enough or as much as you would like, or anything, right, because I’m not here to measure and evaluate, like, what’s enough for each person. But the beautiful thing is, if we really all focused on doing what’s ours to do doing, what we’re well built to do, doing what we have the resources and capacity to do. And we were all I don’t want to say more content. But we were all just focused on that. That adds up. That really adds up, y’all.
Elizabeth DiAlto 10:40
And I know in the social media age, in the 24 hour news cycle age in the there’s always an election coming up age being talked about, like we get no breaks anymore, we really don’t get any breaks. I often think about this, how our parents read the newspaper and watch the news, right? So maybe they were exposed to the news a couple hours a day, at distinct times, you know, I remember my mom would watch in the morning while she was getting ready, they’d pop it on in the evening at my grandparents house, it’d be like the five o’clock news. I know, my grandparents would read the newspaper. But it wasn’t like 24/7 Being able to scroll and access, anything that’s going on anywhere in the world constantly. And that’s a lot, that’s too much. And that makes people feel like they’re not doing enough.
Elizabeth DiAlto 11:31
So orienting ourselves towards what is enough, what is sufficient, what is sustainable for the season in my life. And that’s, you know, one of the reasons why we started out the episode talking about seasons, because not even just like the seasons of the year. But we all go through different seasons and phases in our lives, right, you might have a lot of things going on personally. And you need to tend to your family and your loved ones or your career or your health or something that’s closer to home, then there might be other seasons and phases and cycles when you have that stuff is more under control, it’s flowing, it’s taken care of it’s thriving, and you then have the capacity and the energy to do more things for other people. And it’s just so important to recognize where you put too much pressure on yourself or where you sacrifice yourself, or where you burn yourself out, trying to do more than really is within your capacity. People do this a lot. It’s always a dance.
Elizabeth DiAlto 12:31
So I also wanted to get into some intentions. I wrote in my phone. So I took a walk on Spring equinox day. And as I was walking, sometimes I really like to as my ritual or as my ceremony especially as an embodiment person. Rather than like sitting and doing something in my apartment. I like to go for a walk. And I’ll say prayers while I’m walking. Or I’ll be like communing with nature or just like extra, letting my senses be delighted and merging with the trees or the ocean or you know, whatever is around me in the environment. And really letting myself be open to receiving any intentions that like, you know, I talked about my ancestors, I talked about my divine support squad, I talked about just the divine God, the great beloved in general, that they want to share with me or through me right or that they want to invite me to, I like to receive my intentions.
Elizabeth DiAlto 13:28
People talk a lot about setting intentions, which can sometimes become a big mental process, right? When we only get our intentions from our minds and what we think we want or what we think we’re supposed to do, and aren’t also receiving the intentions from you know, all the beings that support us in the unseen realms and the divine as well. They’re not always the best intention, sometimes they can take us in a direction that we don’t necessarily need to go in or it could be a bit of a detour to the main path that is intended for us. So I was taking my little spring equinox walk yesterday. And the intention, these two sentences dropped in one was multiplicity of connection, intimacy, and creativity. And the other was next level slash renewed power and strength, physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. So I wanted to riff on those things a little bit in this episode too.
Elizabeth DiAlto 14:29
So multiplicity of connection, intimacy and creativity. Something that I’ve been loving so much about my exploration, My sacred slit experiment, and my exploration of polyamory is being able to zoom out. And some of you who’ve been listening have heard me use this phrase like, what is my constellation of companions, and not even just lovers or friends with benefits or whatever, but like all of my companions in this life as a solo living person who does not have a primary partner, it doesn’t have my own immediate family. The eye view, you know, my friends, my soul family and my blood family. It’s this whole big constellation of companions of people I’m out here doing life with, right. Even all of you, you know, you’re in my professional constellation. Those of you some of you listen to the podcast, or we connect on social media, some of you are in a bit closer and deeper in the School of sacred embodiment, whether you’ve taken a program or a course, or you’re in sacred embodiment, specialist training, where you’re in the wild soul sacred body membership, or you’ve come to a workshop, this is what the multiplicity of connection is, right, it’s an intimacy
Elizabeth DiAlto 15:34
Because I am so into exploring intimacy, because some of you have heard me say this phrase before, too. There’s this illusion of connectivity, right? That, you know, we’re all digitally connected, people are at your fingertips, right? At any given moment, you can send someone an email, you can send them a text message, you can, you could send him a DM on multiple different platforms, like, there’s just so many different ways to connect to and connect with people. But that’s just communicate, right? Like there’s a difference between being able to communicate with someone and actually connecting, actually having intimacy, and what is your connection, rooted in? And based on and centered around, right? And so I like to look at life almost like a food pyramid. What are the nutrients? What are the different things that you need to feel seen a mat, and held and supported? And all these things? And then what are the people in your life that help you do all of those things? And how do you help other people in your life do all those things,
Elizabeth DiAlto 16:35
because self made is a myth, right? None of us do anything alone, it’s really not possible. In my conversation, in the real up level with my friend we is one of the things we were talking about is people love to talk about divesting from the system and capitalism and stuff like that. But unless you’re actually like learning, and know how to live off the land, make your own food, make your own clothes, unless you’re not engaging in any kind of commerce, that exchanges money in any way. You know, you’re still engaging in capitalism, which is okay, there are ways to engage with capitalism that are not as harmful as others, right, everything exists on a spectrum.
Elizabeth DiAlto 17:19
But you know, as long as I’m paying rent, getting my food at the grocery store, you know, running this fucking business, like paying platforms, even this podcast, right, there’s a podcast editor and producer, there’s the platform you hosted on, there’s the website, there’s all the different players that you have access to the podcast on, we are all very, very much engaging in these systems. And we don’t have to beat ourselves up about that, or, again, the way the world is structured right now, it’s not really possible for most people to survive unhooked from the systems, but we can engage with them in different ways in more conscious and beautiful ways, as things begin to shift. But it’s also important that we not lie to ourselves or think that we’re more virtuous than we are, when it’s actually not possible to be.
Elizabeth DiAlto 18:09
So looking at that, and zooming out on that, when we more prioritize these values of connection and intimacy, then we can really demonstrate an ethic of care, right, this collectivism or movement towards more interdependence, rather than the hyper independence, or the hyper individualism that has gotten us to these places, these undesirable, harmful places with society.
Elizabeth DiAlto 18:11
And I was listening to a podcast recently with Adrian Marie Brown and Ruby Warrington. And it was such a great episode, we’ll link it up in the show notes, it was on Ruby Warrington podcasts. And this is one of the things that they were talking about how people, you know, we talk a lot about capitalism, which can sometimes feel like a nebulous term, but they were describing it as an addiction to like consumption and accumulation. And that I loved because that, to me, feels more tangible, that this thing that I said the sentence I wrote down the multiplicity of connection, intimacy and creativity, one of the ways we can really apply creativity for doing better, and making a more conscious loving, rooted in an ethic of care contribution to the world we live in, in our communities and stuff like that, is we can look at our habits of consumption and accumulation. That’s where we could be like, cool, where am I good?
Elizabeth DiAlto 19:41
You know, and the real up level interview series and a lot of the conversations I I asked the speakers about what I call my four S’s, it’s about redefining success and prosperity on your own terms. I haven’t named this framework yet, but it’s sufficiency, sustainability, soulfulness, and satisfied auction, I recorded a podcast about this at the end of 2021. We’ll link up to that in the show notes as well. Because these are ways that we can really consciously be creative. And go, Hmm, what’s actually enough? You know, in all the different areas of my life? What is enough for me? Like, what’s enough money? What’s enough social time? What’s enough work? What’s enough creative expression? What’s enough connection? You know, all these different things? That’s what sufficiency is? And then what’s sustainable? Like, what can I actually keep going for the long haul? Because this is how people burn themselves out. They don’t think like systemically, systematically sustainably, they don’t think ecologically they don’t think in the long term, right? They don’t think about cool this choice that I’m making today. How might that ripple out over the next 10 years over the next five years, right?
Elizabeth DiAlto 20:52
This choice to consume or accumulate, or you know, all these different types of things. And I think about a great example is people who get hooked into the idea that they need to own a home. And so they buy a home. And then things just start going wrong in the house. And then all of a sudden, you know, they’re having to pay for all these repairs if they weren’t anticipating in these expenses. And it becomes much more of a burden than an investment, which is one of the reasons why they did it. Right. And that’s like a very basic example. Very narrow example. There’s so many different ways. So I wonder for you like where in your life? Are there choices that you’ve made, that you’re kind of dealing with the ramifications of now, because you didn’t think it through? Or you didn’t think it forward very far.
Elizabeth DiAlto 21:37
Right, I certainly have all kinds of things like that, which kind of gets me into the next piece of the next level, slash renewed power and strength, physical, mental, emotional, spiritual. So I really started my healing journey at the end of my 20s. So in 2012 2011 2011 2012, so I was like, 2829, right around my Saturn Return. And that’s when I first started working with healers. That’s when I first realized I had trauma. And I spent the better part of my 30s till about 3536. really deeply doing intense healing work, trauma, healing, stuff like that. As I was getting more into my later 30s, I had cleared out a lot of stuff. And then it became about the sustainability thing I was talking about, cool. How am I going to? How am I going to live the rest of my life, all this stuff that I’ve just healed? How am I going to be this person that I’ve worked so hard to become right? And that’s not to say, I don’t have more healing to do, but it’s not like a It’s not like it was before, because I have cleared out so much stuff. Now. It’s just like, I deal with things as they come up. But I really excavated I did a lot of that, basically, what does that if I was 3637? I’m 39 now, so like two years ago, yeah, like deep into like 2020 2021, especially at the end of 2021, I started doing some ancestral healing work that was going into a more expansive phase, right?
Elizabeth DiAlto 23:12
Because there’s so many phases and stages with healing, there is the part where we need to just like get out, like, excavate a lot of bullshit, get it out of our systems. And then we start going cool, how do I now expand right now that all this stuff, I cleared all this stuff, kind of similar, right? In metaphor and analogy to spring cleaning, right? We clean out we refresh the energy. So there’s space for new things to come in. And that’s kind of how it is in healing, you know, all these things that we like, release and clear out, you know, people who work with the full moon and you have a release ritual every month. Why do we release we release to create room for other things, right? Why do you prune a garden? Why do you weed the garden to make room for new growth.
Elizabeth DiAlto 23:54
And so for me, as I was doing a lot of that mental and emotional work, that healing the nervous system stuff, while also really deepening into my spirituality, because what a lot of my healing revealed to me was that I’m a mystic. And that healing really is my path. And so allowing myself to be the things that I am, which in the modern world that we live in, are not conventional or not the norm or not necessarily socially acceptable. And it kind of puts me on the fringe of society in some ways that I don’t mind. It’s challenging. And I’m sure some of you can relate to that. But there’s a tax to that. There’s a tax to like fully embracing who you are. And then the beautiful thing, which pings back to what I was talking about earlier, is then you get to find your people. You get to find your people who are going to embrace you who are going to hold you who are going to see you and meet you where you are as you are, no matter how non traditional or unconventional or mystical or weird or magical or whatever words you Wanna use to describe it that you are.
Elizabeth DiAlto 25:02
So even this past weekend, I was reflecting on I recently did a cleanse because my body was just like girl, like, deal with some of this inflammation. I’ve had chronic inflammation for a couple years. And I was also really curious how the inflammation was affecting some chronic pain and stuff I was having, especially in my back. And the cleanse was really miraculous, it was really amazing, did some beautiful things for me. And it also felt really good to be able to do a cleanse from a place of, I’m not trying to lose weight. Like that’s not the point. The point is, you know, dealing with some very specific physical things, that also really helps clear up some brain fog. It’s helped with my ADHD, you know, bodies are so amazing. And there’s so many beautiful reasons to do things that aren’t fat phobic, or that aren’t self deprecating or degrading, or abusive, or violent or anything like that. And so I did this cleanse. And it was really, again, the timing was so beautiful, because like we do spring cleaning of the home, I was doing spring cleaning of like my soul’s home, right my body.
Elizabeth DiAlto 26:09
And just some some insights and things that could land for me, I got back in the gym, I reorganize my kitchen, I’ve been cooking more, making better food choices than I have in years. And it’s just been easy, because I’m in a season in my life now where that’s more accessible for me where I have more capacity for that than I had for a while. But kind of like I was mentioning earlier, I really have had to deal with some ramifications and some repercussions of those years when I was deep in that healing. And I just didn’t have the capacity. And I was doing more emotional eating and stuff like that, which really affected me, you know, I had my gallbladder out last year, that was a big wake up call for me. And no one’s above that stuff, right? Even people who know their bodies really well, like I do like, there’s still some unavoidable shit that we’re all going to have to deal with from time to time.
Elizabeth DiAlto 26:55
So now what I’m really excited about, especially as I record this, approximately, like six months out from turning 40. And this is something that I’ve really been consciously and intentionally using 39. Four is to go, Okay, I just spent the last decade for the most part, doing all this mental, emotional and spiritual work. And I really let the physical go by the wayside. Whereas leading up to that in my 20s, it was really way before that, because I was always an athlete through elementary school, middle school, high school into college, and working out. And then I was a personal trainer. So physical, had been the most important thing to me and my big focus and focal point for like two decades. And then in my 30s, I kind of just, I let that go to the wayside, I got very inconsistent with that. And there were periods when I could be a little more consistent, but it wasn’t just like part of my practice.
Elizabeth DiAlto 27:50
And so going into my 40s I really want to reintegrate not reintegrate for the first time in my life really integrate well, all four of those things, physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, and the physical is where I have been lacking, for the most part, more, you know, in terms of like working out eating well, stuff like that. And you know, I had this real, I don’t even want to call it an epiphany, but just something that’s been landing for me over the last year plus, since I got my gallbladder out, is how deeply I had gotten into like alternative methods and therapies and things like that. And I still really believe and appreciate that stuff. But I’m also seeing how I went a little too far. Right? I went a little too far into stuff like that. And I denied and ignored the physical, which again, resulted in things like getting my gallbladder removed, having this chronic inflammation, some real physical repercussions that I’m now unwinding and dealing with and seeing, you know, how’s my body want to be going into my 40s? And what’s going to be sustainable? And how do I set myself up for the rest of my life to be as enjoyable as possible, and as pain free as possible?
Elizabeth DiAlto 29:05
And it won’t be completely pain free or anything like that. But how can I do that for myself, and you know, for you all, listening, all of our bodies are different. So what is sustainable and what makes sense for me, might be completely different for you. So as always, you know, put any of this stuff in your own context, your standards, your desires, your needs are probably different than mine. So I’m never out here like evangelizing that my life choices are the best life choices, and everyone should be making them. Just sharing my process with you. So you can perhaps get some insight or context for your own unique process or the path of the journey that you want to walk.
Elizabeth DiAlto 29:40
One of the things that I’ve realized is how important convenience is for me, especially as I get a deeper understanding of how my ADHD works. And so these are all just important things to navigate because if we don’t feel good, and if we don’t have energy, we can’t contribute to any of the things we want to for you and contribute to You know, so it feels good. It feels exciting to be integrating these things now. So that I could go into my 40 is very intentionally more balanced in the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual and be honest with myself about, it’s so easy for me to go into like the mental, emotional and spiritual realms, because I do that work professionally. And it’s funny because I used to do the physical, I was a personal trainer, I used to do that professionally. But that in my 30s, that just began to feel more arduous to me. And so I also had to be honest with myself about where was I shying away from even things that a bit more tedious or arduous, or just boring to be quite honest, but are still so important?
Elizabeth DiAlto 30:43
Because I think one of the things, one of the ways in which you know like coaching spirituality, self help, personal development, stuff like that, does us a big disservice, is convincing us that everything is supposed to feel good, or everything is supposed to feel the way we want it to feel. And if it doesn’t, we’re doing something wrong. Right? Or last night, we do a monthly asked me anything call in the wild soul sacred body membership. And last night, someone was asking about boundaries, and relationships and connection and effort. And you know how sometimes it just feels like so much effort. And if it’s that much effort, it can’t possibly be in alignment, right? And I was like, Well, what makes you think that alignment should feel effortless, you know, alignment actually requires a lot of effort. But that is some of the popular, unhelpful, unhealthy messaging that’s out there, right.
Elizabeth DiAlto 31:37
when you’re in alignment, everything just flows, and it should feel good. Listen, when you’re in alignment, yes, things will flow better. But it doesn’t mean it feels good. And it doesn’t mean that you only get to do things that you want to do. We all have to do things that we don’t necessarily want to do, that aren’t our favorite things, from time to time. And this is reminding me of something else that Adrian Marie Brown said in that podcast that I was listening to with her and Ruby Warrington. This was such a great and astute observation. She was saying, you know, if this promise of like capitalism, and all these things, and accumulation was really what they say it is, then we would see higher rates of like happiness and joy in the people who have the most right. But that is not the case, you see higher levels of like depression and anxiety and all this stuff, mental health issues in like some of the wealthiest, most successful whatever people in the world are also the most mentally and emotionally unhealthy. dysregulated stressed out, right. Whereas you could go into poor communities that are more connected community wise, because they have to be, they have to rely on each other. So they have more genuine connection and community care going on out of necessity. And those people might not have nearly as much but there’s more genuine joy and happiness, like there is a correlation that is measurable, and that is verifiable. And what an interesting lens to look through things.
Elizabeth DiAlto 33:12
And I personally can share, like, in 2017, when I moved to Malibu, I moved into the largest home that I have ever lived in on my own. It was a three bedroom townhouse. And I did that because I was you know, I was hosting a lot of workshops and events and trainings. And I thought, Great, let me just get a house that I can run things out of my home, kill two birds with one stone not be having to find venues and stuff like that, the rent was almost $5,000 a month. And that was not sustainable. For me at that time. It was a lot of pressure every month to pay that rent. Also, where the location was, I hadn’t thought out wasn’t necessarily easy for people to get to. And so I was able to host a couple of things there. But all in all, that was not a great choice for me. And I dealt with the ramifications of that choice financially for a couple years afterwards. And it was a great space, but I was also very isolated out there. It just wasn’t what I thought it was going to be. And when I downsize, I was like, I just need to move back into like a one bedroom apartment. Like I want to be in a building. I want to be in a community. Like I want to be able to walk to stuff, I just let me let me downsize. Let me get rid of a whole bunch of stuff. And I’ve been living in smaller places since then. And it has just been the best, right?
Elizabeth DiAlto 34:33
I’m by no means necessarily a minimalist, but I’m way more minimalist than a lot of people I know. And I just don’t need a lot of stuff. I just started evaluating where do I just not need nearly as much as I think I do. Where can I not only make do with what I already have, but where’s what I already have like, so good like sufficient enough. So, all these things kind of weaving together right? The multiplicity of of connection, intimacy and creativity. And connection isn’t just about connecting with other people, right? When I talk about those four S’s and redefining success and prosperity on your own terms, it’s also connecting to what are your real honest desires? What are your real honest needs? Where are you nutrient deficient in support and connection, or creative expression or whatever in your life? And then what do you need to do about that, right,
Elizabeth DiAlto 35:26
because connection, intimacy, and creativity are so interwoven, connected and collaborative with each other, we need that and to feel real power and strength and buy power. I’m not talking about these power structures, I ran a program called power, where we work through my self liberation program for many years. I took a little break from it since 2020, but we’re bringing it back this summer. And starting up in August, I’ve redone the program a little bit. And I’m really excited about that. Because that self liberation framework is an exploration of true power, right? We’re talking about like soul power, we’re talking about everything that you are all your brilliance, your amazing nation magnificence. You know, when you love, trust and respect yourself, and you can, can feel your real power, not the kind of power that these silly systems make us think is real power, because none of that really is that’s constructed. But what’s like the real power of your soul that is meant to come through you in this lifetime. That is meant to be like your gift, your contribution to humanity and the earth. And this, this beautiful place that we get to inhabit that. I know it can be a dumpster fire, but it’s also still so miraculous.
Elizabeth DiAlto 36:36
So anyway, that was my little riff today, we went for almost 40 minutes and I think we’re gonna go that long. So let me know what you got out of that. Let me know how it was for you share it up. If you’re a social media person. You know, I always post about it on Instagram. If you want to come leave a comment on the post and let me know I’d love to hear from you. And remember, the real up level doesn’t start till April 3. So you can still check that out at the real app. level.com. And thank you everyone so much as always for being here. We’ll see you later.